Waning Eclipse
by RisingWinter
Summary: Trained at a school for orphans to be an elite operative for his country, Noel progressed through the ranks until he was on level with and befriended some of the school's most respected mentors. He graduated as a SeeD operative some time ago and he thinks this might be a better life for him than the one on Pulse. Takes place a year after VIII. Contains massive spoilers for both VII
1. Chapter 1

_Noel trailed behind Quistis, wishing she would let him keep up. "Come on, talk to me! They can't just demote you for no reason!"_

_"They can and they did."_

_"Why? What changed? Was it the last mission? They can't take you down for one small misstep!"_

_"There's no point asking – it's been done."_

_"That's not the point! The Quistis I knew would never accept the chopping block like this. Is it about that kid?"_

_"It's not about Squall."_

_"Oh, it's Squall, now? Not Leonhart? What changed that?"_

_"We're equals now. And I'm starting to think you're jealous."_

_"Not jealous." Noel grabbed her shoulder and forced her to face him. "Just worried."_

* * *

He waited for Quistis to join him. They didn't talk as much anymore, but Noel still looked forward to their interactions – Quistis provided reason and grounding when he couldn't find it in himself, his students, or his peers.

The diner Noel sat in was one of Balamb's go-to places to eat, as evidenced by the black-clad students filling most of the dozens of tables. Above them, Selphie Tilmitt and her small band drummed out a pleasant tune accompaniment by flute and guitar. The air was warm with the smell of fresh food, which made Noel's stomach rumble as a reminder that he hadn't eaten since breakfast and it was already well into the afternoon.

Being around so many warm bodies reminded him of wandering Academia's streets and wondering how so many people could live in one place. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't remember how he came to know of that place.

"Bit of a difference, isn't it?" Noel asked as Quistis took the spot opposite him at the table. "Being Leonhart's advisor now instead of being cut down to size like before."

Quistis allowed him a reluctant smile. "I could do without all the mandatory meetings. You on the other hand… would you turn them down on the spot or hold the position long enough to go completely mad and force them to fire you?"

Noel shrugged. "Might kill one or two. I've always wanted to train Squall, but I guess this means he's better than I am, now."

Quistis pursed her lips. "I wouldn't say that. He's proven himself to be more talented than I would have anticipated, but I'd also mention that he's the headmaster now. The position doesn't require as much battle prowess as it requires a negotiating mind. And he doesn't get a lot of chances to keep himself sharp."

A waitress came by, carrying a plate of cut sandwiches that Noel gratefully accepted and offered to Quistis, who took one. "Greens," she said. "Good choice. Though I'm surprised you didn't go for the crab specialty."

Noel shrugged and set the plate down. "It depends on the day, for me."

"Back to the matter at hand – Squall wants you in Galbadia."

"Galbadia?"

"I've asked to go along but he thinks it would be good for you to improve relations and show some of their new students how it's done."

Noel scarfed down a sandwich. "I don't like working with youngsters. Especially not in a military school."

"I know." Quistis took a breath. "But it might be a good chance to work yourself out, you know. Check out the changes they've made. Beat your insomnia."

"It's not insomnia."

"You're not sleeping and that's the definition of insomnia."

"Insomnia is the inability. I choose not to."

"It would help."

"I doubt it."

Quistis nibbled on a sandwich, face thoughtful. "How long ago did your friend leave?"

"… Four years. Give or take a few weeks."

She shook her head. "Probably forgot at this point."

Noel looked at the food, appetite lost. Cater swore she would return with answers. "I'm better off here, anyway."

"We certainly prefer to keep you, but if you're unhappy, then we should find something better."

"There's no 'we.' It's my own responsibility."

"But do you really have to leave? You have responsibilities here and the students need you. There's this thing with consistency and-"

Noel cut her off, "I have obligations to myself as well. My travels keep me focused, keep me sharp. They keep my… memories at bay. And I can't let my own skills slide if I'm going to provide for the school."

"Maybe." Quistis licked her lips and looked down. "You should know I've been seeing things."

"Yeah, join the club."

"No, I mean…" Quistis took a deep breath and looked him square on. "This man's been talking to me in my dreams."

"Man?"

"Speaks like he's from a hundred years ago. Calls himself Auron." Quistis linked her fingers together and leaned forward. "He claims to be from another world, like your friend, and he's here to rush things along for them. Honestly, Noel, I'm not sure if you should trust these people."

"Why not?"

"Because we don't know what they want." Quistis lowered her voice. "Are they really dead beings or the result of some brainwashing technique?"

Noel worked his mouth for a moment. "What if they confirm what I remember?"

"And what if those memories are planted? If they can speak directly to my mind, how do we know they can't fake your memories? I'm still not convinced that it's not related to the Guardian Force."

"I never used it as much as you all."

"Of course not." Quistis shook her head and leaned away. Picked up to go. "Don't let your guard down. Balamb has suffered too much to deal with a second otherworldly crisis. I have a session, but you'll keep me updated, yes?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks for lunch."

Noel nodded, unable to think of how to respond before she disappeared out the way she came.

He never told her the whole story. He never told her about his life as a hunter or his journey with Serah or his struggles in Luxerion. He never told her because he knew she would listen. Listen and maybe even believe him. And if she believed him, then there wasn't much to keep him from going back. And now _she_ was the one talking about other worlds and presences and all that.

And he was the one that couldn't remember what led to his solitude in Luxerion.

At the thought, he caught a whiff of Serah's perfume and the screaming sound of his blade against Caius'. He remembered his sword sinking into his once-friend's heart and the way the skin broke on impact. He tasted old jerky and the threatening rain of the plains. Serah growing cold in his arms and Hope's shuddering sobs.

But he couldn't remember his mother's face or his sister's favorite poems. He couldn't remember Lightning's purpose or her connection to him. And he couldn't remember when he first met Serah – it was like she just appeared later in his life and suddenly they knew each other like they were siblings.

He finished off the remaining sandwich slice and left his pay on the table before making the way back to his dorm room.

The garden was quiet as he passed, with most students out for the weekend. As it was, those he saw avoided getting too close – ever since that incident with suspending the entire school, the place treated him like he was some advocate to the devil despite the hushed whispers of admiration.

Returning to his room felt like returning home. Or, it felt as close as it would get without finding a way back to Pulse.

The late afternoon light bathed the room in soft shadows thanks to the sheer curtains and set ablaze the bookshelf in which he kept his collected items and trinkets from working with Cater. She gave him one of her pistols, which laid on the top. Crimson lines traced its shape to a wooden handle and he could see evidence of use in the blackened tip.

Near that was the shattered remains of a crystal ornament they found in some caves off the east coast. It looked suspiciously like an artefact, but they never found a gate to correspond to it.

Other items in the shelf included various cards he collected from the cities they visited, along with fossilized wood pieces and shining rocks from the far reaches of the Centra Ruins.

Despite their travels, however, they never found the gates that they both knew would have to crop up for him to travel properly. Cater had told him she would come back once she found them, but that was… a while ago.

He threw himself on the bed and wondered how long it was since he first remembered, when battle made him think that there should be a pink-haired girl beside him. How long had it been since he missed Yeul's chiming laugh at his lame jokes? How long since he regretted facing Lightning in Luxerion? How long since his dormant powers awoke and suspended the school in a bubble of zero gravity?

The room was quiet. Noel covered his eyes with his arm, heart aching. He didn't belong in Balamb, no matter how much they scheduled him in for training. They only kept him because they lost too many of their instructors during the siege. But then, why would the party of former l'Cie want him back? Wasn't it the same issue there, that he only helped because he was there?

How was he necessary for in the grand scheme of things when Lightning and her party could do twice the work in half the time? When they had the powers of l'Cie?

Even Cater must have realized eventually that he was less valuable than the others, if she didn't bother to get him back.

At least Balamb expressed a need for him.

A trilling voice sounded outside – an unfamiliar one – and feet pattered past akin to the footsteps of an animal. But he didn't know anyone outside of Rinoa that used familiars.

"That's odd." The words surprised him – it was months since he last remembered something. "I don't feel it."

He tended to remember things through verbalizing them to himself – he lost control of his mouth and it synced with his brain or something.

"Wait." He stood, the motion seeming natural to him. Looked around. "Is that…"

He didn't actually feel anything, but he imagined a rapid pulse within him, strong and chaotic. "The Heart. It's mine, now."

Caius, bled out before him, showed no life in his eyes.

"I took your curse from you." Noel kneeled beside him, placed a hand on Caius' body to find it cold and without a pulse. "May you rest in peace, old friend."

The power of Etro within him roared with energy and he thought for a moment the rage of it would break through his chest. But instead it filled him with strength and motivated him to keep moving. Something within clicked and his mission became clear.

… Who was Etro?

Noel snapped out of it and returned to his room. Sunlight spilled through the window and he knew mere seconds passed. He was back to himself.

Weird. He couldn't connect that memory with everything else he collected over the past years. Did it really happen? Did it matter?

Noel jumped back to his feet. Quistis was right – no point in a pity party now when he had training rituals to run. He couldn't let the distractions of other lives and worlds take away from the responsibilities of the now.

* * *

Irvine enjoyed the time he spent with his friends in Balamb. Even after the fiasco last year and everything that happened before, he didn't think there was any other place he could act so freely and like himself.

He fingered the notes on his sax and beside him, Selphie warmed up on the piano with some extended chords. Zell plucked at the strings of his guitar from where he sat on the couch, and Quistis prepped her bow with rosin before tuning the strings.

"Why don't we do something slow after this one?" Selphie asked. "Might be good for the atmosphere, you know?"

"Ugh." Zell played up an octave. "As long as it's not depressing – I hate that!"

"Slow doesn't mean depressing!"

"It depends on the listener," Quistis reminded them. "But I suspect the owner would be openminded to a change of pace. Why don't we try something romantic?"

"We're already doing a romantic one!" Zell groaned. "What do you want from me?"

Irvine hummed into his sax. "A ballad."

"Ooh." Selphie paused her playing. "One of those wistful ones! You know, with the soft openings and, like, broken endings!"

"I'll talk with the owner," Quistis said. "For now, let's focus on our songs for tomorrow."

Selphie resumed playing. "Has anyone seen Seifer? I haven't heard anything in months!"

"You expect that jerk to talk to you?" Zell asked. "You're insane – he should be dead right now, anyway."

"Not really, I just… I don't know. I feel bad for him."

"Pity," Quistis said, "will not encourage others to maintain a relationship with you."

Irvine finished a string of notes. "I doubt Seifer's the kind to care about any relationship that isn't based on bolstering his pride. Even _if_ he survived what happened."

"You all make him out to be such a villain." Selphie frowned. "But I guess you're right. He doesn't care about any of us."

"Leave Seifer to his gang," Quistis said. "They'll deal with him better than any of us could. If he's still alive."

Irvine's phone buzzed and he set down his sax. "One moment, guys."

Quistis gave him an inquisitive look but he turned away before answering the call. "Yes?"

"Irvine Kinneas," came a familiar voice over the other end.

"Speaking."

"This is Martine Aguamar, Headmaster of Galbadia Garden. I have a mission to assign you."

Irvine glanced to the others, who remained distracted with their instruments. He left the room and walked toward the quietest part of the building. "First of all, I'd like to congratulate you on your reappointment, sir, but I transferred to Balamb when I was assigned to the sorceress and-"

"I'm well aware of your status, Kinneas. But this is something we're to avoid official procedure on."

"Again."

"This time, we're not meddling in the affairs of government."

Irvine found an abandoned lounge and took a seat. "Okay. What is it?"

Hesitation on the other end. "Bear in mind, this is something that I didn't propose myself. In fact, this is more for your own sake. Certain powers have locked onto you and your friends and will take the shot if they get the chance. I would like for you to get this done before these powers have reason to pull something unwelcome."

Irvine's blood ran cold and he rubbed his temple. "What do they want?"

"A target neutralized. Details will be sent to your device once you accept and that will buy Zell some time."

"Zell? Why Zell?"

"No questions yet."

Pressed his lips into a fine line. "… Right."

"I'm going to avoid a war between the gardens. If you do the job yourself, you're the only one to take the fall. Your friends get away scot-free and life goes on as usual for everyone else. Otherwise, they'll make you regret it through the cost of your friends lives, starting with Zell."

"The target will be moved to Galbadia within the next couple of days so book transit here ASAP. Don't breathe a word of this to anyone. Don't trust a single face and don't repeat anything I've said. Understand?"

"… Yes."

"Do you accept the mission?"

He cleared his dry throat. Forced the words out, "I do."

"I've sent the details to your phone. Protect that device with your life and don't use it too often. Look over the report once and delete the file immediately. Follow protocol as if you were back here."

"Yes, sir."

"… Good luck, Kinneas."

The line clicked off and Irvine took a moment to recover his breath.

Eventually the phone chimed and he pulled it open to check messages. Martine sent a file full of all the documentation he expected to see if he were back in Galbadia. Code and guidelines listed first, same as most missions save for an occasional detail to heed in this special case. After that came warnings and protocol for operating on specific grounds. What not to do and all that.

Need-to-know section for the mission's motivation, then finally the mark's profile. Irvine swallowed his disgust and forced himself to memorize the picture.

_Noel Kreiss_, it read. _Instructor of Balamb Garden._

"Irvine?"

He clicked the phone off and looked up with all the smoothness he learned over the years as an operative. "Selphie."

She stood by the wall, arms folded. "I got worried. Did Squall give you something? This was supposed to be our break and-"

"No." Irvine stood and stuffed the phone in his pocket. "No, just an old friend from Galbadia wanting to check in. Would have distracted you guys."

She flashed a grin. "Then you can come help me pick out a ballad! I'm looking at some of the popular ones and I thought you might have a good idea which one people would like best?"

Irvine pursed his lips. "I'm… kind of tired, actually. Head hurts."

Selphie strode over and bent over to look him straight-on. "You don't look so good, either. Let's take you back to your room. Think you'll still be up for our number tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I just…" Irvine stood and Selphie straightened. "I'll be fine. Might take a trip to see people in Galbadia afterward – you know, take advantage of this break as long as it lasts."

Selphie nudged him in the shoulder. "You better – Squall knows not to use our friendship as an excuse to let us off the hook. Sometimes, I even think he likes to make life harder for us than the others."

Irvine forced a smile. "At least he's not as bad as some others."

"He's the worst one _I've _known! Cid never put us through the ringer and Trabia took good care of its students! If Galbadia is worse, then I'm glad you got here."

"So am I." Irvine looked away. "So am I."


	2. Chapter 2

_Noel fell._

_Wind whipped his hair billowing about him like an angry storm despite the lack of a single cloud in the sky. He would thank Quistis later for the chest piece._

_Something in the wind triggered a memory, one of fighting alongside a pink-haired girl and capturing monsters in prisons of light._

_Noel could never place the time and the girl's name continued to elude him, but he became familiar with these moments when he could swear he saw into another life. He saw a version of him that strove as a hunter in a barren land, a version of him that swore himself to a girl older than him that he would protect her from the horrors of the abyss._

_More wind in his face._

_He remembered standing on an aircraft with the girl dying in his arms. That memory recurred with the strongest clarity and Noel wondered what impact she had on him. He wondered why he felt her body growing cold in his arms._

_Noel hit the ground with his lance point-first and leapt away. Caught a glimpse of skittering legs and lumbering machines._

_"You're getting rusty," Quistis quipped, appearing beside him. "Look – you missed the target."_

_After he caught his breath, he retorted, "Only by a few inches."_

* * *

Noel hated teaching. He hated talking. He hated everything about words when it came to battle.

Yet Noel still stepped into the demonstration room with as much enthusiasm as he could muster to find it full of his typical turnout of ready students dressed in the uniform of pre-SeeDs. His volunteer today was Selphie from Squall Leonhart's old party and while he never met her in person before, the staff assured she would be a good match.

Placed his notes on the desk and turned to the students. "Before we start, are there any questions?"

A dozen hands flew up and he chose the one closest to him.

The girl asked, "What was the Battle of the Gardens like?"

"How many people did you kill?" asked another.

"Did you get any cool battle scars?"

Noel sighed and took a seat on his desk. "It wasn't as exciting as all that. I was placed in charge of protecting some of the younger students and warding off the ground units."

"But you still fought, right?"

Noel looked to Selphie, who flashed him an expectant smile. "Yes. But only for minutes at a time."

"Do you remember one particular opponent that gave you trouble?"

Fine. Noel stood and took to the center of the room. "Perhaps the one asking the question would volunteer to help me demonstrate?"

The young cadet bounded down from his seat and joined Noel on the floor. Noel pulled his sword loose. "Our SeeDs first encountered the G-Soldiers on the western side. Most of the space there is open and unguarded, but one of my students got pinned to the wall. If you could stand here, please."

The cadet shifted into the spot his target had.

"Now." Noel gestured for Selphie to join them and she did. "Student was here, G-Soldier here. Do you see the conundrum here?"

Nods and murmured affirmations.

"I could tackle the enemy from behind given my position or I could distract him. None of those seemed feasible at the time."

More murmurs. Noel flexed his fingers and remembered the moment of clarity that came to him. But that wasn't something these students would understand, so he twisted it into something they would.

"I panicked and did both." He took a piece of paper from the desk and crumpled it up. "I had rocks and debris all over the place, so I took one and lugged it."

Hit the student in the back and the kid turned to face him.

"Given the distraction…" Noel stepped closer, brought out his sword, and pointed it at the kid. "… I got his attention and the SeeD flanked him with me. Not too bad, right?"

Another hand in the air. "Yes?"

The student, a girl with short pigtails, asked, "But what about the space thing you did that everyone talks about?"

Noel hesitated. "The what?"

"The space thing," another repeated. "Come on, it's why you're famous! Can we at least see it?"

"Oh, yeah!" Selphie gestured. "The space thing!"

The thing that he tried to keep under wraps so Squall wouldn't keep him on missions for the rest of his life. "… Oh. The _space_ thing."

There really wasn't much to it. He brought his sword to level with his shoulder and held it out for everyone to see. "Don't try this at home."

Jumped and threw it. Hit it with a wormhole and it dropped from the ceiling. But the staff would kill him if he damaged the floor, so he opened another wormhole in the floor below it and sent it flying out of the wall.

It clattered to the ground with enough of a shriek that he probably still scraped the mat.

Scattered "oohs" and "aahs."

"And that segues nicely into our topic today. You all know Selphie Tilmitt?" Nods and other scattered confirmations rippled back to him. "Today, we'll focus on defensive techniques like we talked about last time. Selphie, would you take the offensive?"

"Of course, sir!" She pulled a pair of nunchaku from a holster strapped to her leg and twisted it in her hands.

They squared off, using the unused space in the center. Selphie took up her nunchaku and gripped it ready while Noel held his sword before him in standard stance.

Selphie danced around him, an elegant fluidity to her motion. Noel moved with her, edging her out of her territory. She didn't take well to being pushed toward a couple of students and lashed out.

That connected with his knee.

He ignored the pain and dove in. Took her by the shoulder.

She yelped and distanced herself again.

Noel bit his lip. He wasn't used to fighting someone on his level. Sure, Quistis made for a good-

The wood smacked him again and Selphie gave him an intense look. "Take me seriously!"

Noel flipped his sword into a backhanded grip and set his fist in front of him.

Selphie reacted with a lash, which Noel slapped away with his sword before throwing himself at her and kicking out her legs.

She recovered faster than he could blink, and Noel lost his breath when her chain caught on his ankle and yanked him to the ground.

Noel blinked spots out of his eyes and the world spun around him.

Noel flexed his jaw before throwing himself back to his feet. Barely evaded another hit.

"Go, Instructor Kreiss!"

"Tilmitt, you rock!"

Selphie danced around him again like a professional performer. Correction – she _was_ a professional performer. He couldn't use direct attacks and get anywhere.

Noel threw himself at her, distracting her with a feint to the left before kicking out her legs again.

She hit the ground. He stuck the tip of his practice sword to the concrete between her chin and neck.

Around them, the room erupted into cheers and disappointed sighs.

Noel circled around Selphie, sword loose in his hands.

She launched at him with a swing of her nunchaku, which Noel easily dodged with a duck and roll. He kept it slow, and Selphie followed accordingly. From the crowd, students whispered maneuver names and procedures, following along with rapt attention.

Noel eventually stopped and gestured to Selphie. "I think that's enough for now," he said. "What do you think?"

Selphie bounced in place. "I want to see how your students do."

A murmur of excitement rippled through the crowd and the students spilled out from their seats to fill the ground. Noel exchanged a look with Selphie. "I like to divide half and half," he said. "Unless you have somewhere to be."

"Not at all." Selphie moved to the back and got to guiding some of the youngsters over there. Noel watched those around him, looking for poor form and sloppy technique.

"Rorin," Noel said, stopping by one couple. "Keep your feet. He'll knock you over again if you don't spread out a little further."

"Yes, Instructor."

"Mishi, watch your arm movement as you do that. You're projecting your moves before you act."

"Yes, sir."

After a while, Selphie circled back to him and tapped him on the shoulder. "They're doing great over there."

Noel gave her a skeptical look. "There's always room for improvement."

"They say you're inhuman?" Selphie asked. "I'd love to know how true that is."

"If I was, would you have had such an easy time?"

"I've never seen that speed before."

Noel licked his dry lips and fought to calm his breathing. "I work out a lot."

"I should hope so!" She nudged his shoulder. "Good to know you're on our side. We need more people like you after we lost so many during the coup."

"Sheicker!" Noel called. "Watch your feet! Oran, loosen up! All of you, remember distance and the five points to a proper chokehold!"

"Have you talked to Squall lately?"

Noel shook his head. "Haven't bothered much with questions, to be honest. Just following where he points me for now."

"You should join us tomorrow at the Chocobros'. Our whole party is gathering to do a number and I think you would enjoy it."

Noel tapped his sword against his leg. "Sure. Got any songs on travelers from other worlds?"

Selphie laughed. "No, what for?"

"No reason."

"Hey, Instructor Kreiss," said one kid, approaching him. "You know those things you taught us about Jumping?"

"Yeah," Noel said. "Wouldn't live without 'em."

"So Ulir and I, we used it on this big mecha down south on a mission and we totally creamed its face off!"

Noel slapped him on the back. "That's what happens when you do it right! Good going!"

"Do you think we could learn that thing that you do, eventually?"

"Nah." Noel fumbled for an excuse. "It's… a special maneuver saved for the very best. Something about an ancient technique from the Ancients. Very old and unimitatable."

"Aw." The student walked away, disappointed. Watching him go, Noel caught sight of Quistis standing in the classroom doorway.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

Quistis joined them, arms folded and uniform well-pressed as always. "Everyone looks to be in good form."

"Selphie would agree," Noel said.

"You don't?" Quistis asked.

"He's quite the drillmaster," Selphie said.

Quistis dropped her hands. "Fair enough. So long as we don't get reports of abuse, though, the board appreciates all the progress it can get."

"Just because Squall's a glutton for punishment…"

"Selphie."

The girl frowned but didn't argue it further. Quistis sighed and looked at Noel. "Headmaster Leonhart changed your assignment into a longer-term transfer."

"Oh." Noel looked at Selphie. "I'll miss your performance."

Selphie huffed. "That's stupid."

"We'll find a way to survive," Quistis said. "You'll report back here after however long they've assigned, but I know it's not permanent. For more information, Squall had a document sent to your machine."

"Cool." Noel pulled his communique out of his pocket and found an alert. "Got it."

"How is he more popular than us?" Selphie asked. "I thought _we _were the legends?"

"Here, yes." Quistis folded her arms. "But we all know what Galbadia is like. All stiff protocol and rigid rules – look at your superiors the wrong way and they'll sit you through a lecture to make your great grand children blush."

"Just don't let Irvine hear you." Noel shoved the communique away again. "I should get ready. Take the rest of class for me, will you?"

Quistis nodded and took to the desk. "Way ahead of you. Got anywhere to be, Selphie?"

"Nope!" The girl followed Quistis and Noel took the chance to slip away.

Galbadia. Noel couldn't help a gnawing in his stomach at the thought of them singling him out. Things changed between now and the Sorceress, but they didn't borrow instructors often. And when they did, there tended to be an ulterior motive to it.

He groaned. Did _not _feel like dealing with politics again like he was back in Nova Chrysallia.

On the way, he ran into Ellone, who took him by the shoulder. "Instructor Kreiss?"

He drew up short. "What's up?"

"I-…" She stared at him and moved her mouth without words. Finally stuttered, "Um. I-… What was I saying?"

Noel blinked. "I don't know."

She flushed and stepped back. "I'm so sorry. I was so caught up in my thoughts I lost track of where I was going. I just… kept walking."

"Kept walking?" His mind fogged and memories flickered, threatening to overtake him.

"Yes, I'm afraid that happens sometimes. Feels like I'm the only person left and I start to wander. Not such an uncommon feeling, though, is it?"

Back in his dying world. Back to red skies and black sand stretching off toward the horizon. The memory of this place left a lingering chill on his skin and an emptiness in his chest. He walked in darkness yet he knew every step like he knew his own name. Yet the endless sands stretched beyond the limits of his memory.

The hallway didn't fade from view, nor did Ellone's odd smile at his disorientation.

Without thinking, he moved to find the shining silhouette of Academia. He belonged in those silver halls and wiry control rooms. Hope and Yeul counted on him and if they didn't know where he was, then what was-

Wait.

Noel looked around him. Students stopped in the hallway to stare, but he couldn't talk to them. Ellone stayed by his side.

The urge to find Yeul overtook him. Noel ran through the halls – replaced by sand in his memories – and begged for Hope to stay alive in the meantime. Too much time in the office and handling paperwork made even the strongest fighters, former l'Cie or not, to lose their edge. That's what the staff said, anyway.

Noel found Yeul at the altar and slowed. Walked her way and expected her to collapse into his arms and whisper her last words. Upon approach, however, she changed to Serah.

He stopped. The recollection shorted out and he remembered the school hall that he stood in. Which of these was real?

He stood frozen. Images flashed about him until it settled back in Academia.

Only, he didn't stand there as bodyguard anymore. He held Etro within him and he came looking for Serah and Yeul. His sworn defended. His mutual failures. His lost sisters. And he was ready to spill blood to find them.

Thumping in his chest and a tingle down his fingers. An itching for the blade at his back. A rumble in his throat that felt inhuman and out-of-place. How long did he live like this? Live as nothing but a vessel? The thought of peace seemed as nothing but a distant dream, now.

Noel tried to bring himself back to the present, to speed up the memory, or to snap himself out of it. Thought of taking Yeul's hand before being separated in space.

"I'm right here." Her slight form coalesced beside him and they stood in his dying world. "Where have you been? I thought I'd make some dinner, but…"

"The hunt was scarce." Noel shook his head. "I'll prepare what jerky I can and we'll put off dinner again."

"… Okay."

He was asleep. The realization came as a dull surprise that didn't so much as disturb the moment. "Maybe I'll get something bigger tomorrow, right?"

Serah's form moved past in slow motion.

"You'll be okay, you know. Oh, look, your friend is here to take care of you."

He couldn't move. "Yeul."

"But don't forget me, okay? When everything burns and you find yourself trapped in the bars of the dead, think of me. Think of how much I'd love to see you _hurt_."

Something hard collided with his cheek and his vision flickered.

"Noel!"

He snapped back to reality. "Quistis?"

She stared down at him and he realized he was on something soft. His bed. In his room.

"Odin." Quistis fell to her knees beside him. "I thought I'd have to drag you to the hospital!"

"What happened?"

"When I came knocking, you wouldn't answer. I guess you needed some sleep after all."

"That wasn't…" he struggled into a sitting position and his head pounded for it. "Ugh. That wasn't sleep."

"Nightmares, I guess." Quistis stood. "Either way, you should pack. It's almost nine."

He looked to the clock. He left the classroom hours ago. "Where did Ellone go?"

"Ellone?" Quistis quirked an eyebrow. "I haven't seen her lately – did you two get caught up talking?"

"No." He swallowed hard. "It's nothing."

"Call if you need anything before tomorrow." Quistis left for the door. "And you should probably get a checkup while you're there, just in case."

Even after Quistis left, he couldn't bring himself to move for some time or even go back to sleep.

He could swear it was Ellone that first started talking to him, but when he tried to recall what happened after, he only brought up a short, blonde girl. Probably just mistook her for someone with a similar-sounding name.

Ell…

Elli….

He shook his head. Just another buried memory – there were enough of those still hidden in his mind, it would make sense.

No point in thinking about it further.

* * *

Irvine's heart pounded. Not for the songs they would play, but for what he would face when they ended.

He found a place on the stage of the almost-deserted ground floor of the restaurant and gauged the tables. Imagined them all full and pulled his mind to the present. Thought about playing for people and creating music instead of taking life.

Zell joined him shortly, guitar case in hand, and took a seat opposite him. "You're just going to stand the whole time?"

"Isn't that what sax players do?" Irvine hefted his case onto a seat and cracked it open. Admired the golden sheen of the instrument. "Sitting takes away from the image."

"Oh, come on, you're not as important as all that."

"Keep telling yourself that."

Selphie bounded their way, eyes bright and hair a touch out of order. "You'll never guess where I've been!" She took her spot at the piano and pulled out her special microphone. "Geez, I've seen some weird things!"

"Must have been quite the café," Irvine said.

"The craziest sandwiches," Zell said. Brought his guitar and played some notes. "What, did you eat a fish or something?"

"Fish sandwiches aren't weird." Selphie's grin widened. "Oh, man, I wish I could take you guys! Such greenery! And such blue water! You won't believe it's real!"

"Quite the café," Irvine repeated before bringing out his saxophone.

Quistis joined them on the stage and made her way toward the piano where she set her violin case. "Expect much of a crowd tonight?" she asked as she stretched her fingers.

Zell shrugged and tuned his guitar. "Only if they don't value their ears."

"Oh, shut up," Selphie said, picking out some notes and chords on the piano. Tested her microphone that sat on the piano. "We've attracted plenty of attention every day we've done it this month. If we don't at least fill the hall, then I'll be surprised."

Quistis rolled her eyes. "I think they care more about the food than the music."

"First up!" Selphie announced. "A little warmup!"

That attracted some turned heads from those already sitting with their meals. Selphie played out the first notes to "Eyes on Me," and Quistis followed suit with the opening chord and scale.

Scattered cheers sounded through the gathered patrons.

Selphie sang into the mic, "Whene'er I sang my songs…. On the stage, on my own…"

Irvine waited. Quistis joined with the words and Zell played a steady rhythm in the background.

Once Selphie said, "tiny little bar," he took a breath and introduced the sax in quiet, subtle tones. More people filtered in through the doors.

The audience swayed to the music and some closed their eyes. Others nodded slowly.

"If you show your frown then, I will know for sure that you are no drea~mer."

At the cue, Quistis went solo for a moment. Got everyone's attention. Then Zell and Irvine joined back in with soaring melody.

Selphie took it back. "So let me come to you… Close as I want to be. Close enough for me… To feel your heart beating fast…"

Irvine moved with the others back to rhythmic with occasional focus on the violin. Soared again on "Darling, so there you are… with that look on your face… As if you're never hurt, as if you're never down… Shall I be the one for you? Who pinches you softly but sure… If you show your frown then, I will know for sure that you are no drea~mer."

Slowed down and played on into the outro. Ended with Zell's twinkling notes.

Heartfelt applause. Quistis waited for that to quiet and for them to bow before she signaled for them to start the next one.

Irvine focused on his notes, focused on keeping time. Tried to blot out the thought of what would happen once he left for Galbadia. That was what a good sniper did, after all. Good snipers put away their concerns and emotions until the deed was done and then they went to sleep after a certain number of hours and they moved on.

Over in the corner, Squall took a seat with Rinoa and they settled in to watch. Rinoa beamed their way and Squall even quirked a small smile. Irvine responded with a bounce of his head.

Eventually the time came for them to break and Irvine set down his sax with a groan. Thing got heavy after a while.

Stretched and moved to greet Squall. "Didn't think we'd see you down here," Irvine said.

Squall shrugged. "Not like I live in my office."

"Though it feels like it sometimes." Rinoa leaned against him. "Honestly, I wish you would take more time off."

"School isn't going to handle itself."

"He's got a point there," Irvine said. "Unless we want to end up like Galbadia."

Rinoa frowned. "I wish people would stop picking on them. It's not like they asked to be taken over by Ultimecia."

"Not like they resisted much, either," Squall said.

"Speaking of…" A big man with orange hair brushed past and Irvine stepped out of the walkway. "I'm going to spend a couple of days in Galbadia if that's okay with you. Got some catching up to do with an old friend."

"You still talk to them?" Rinoa asked. "That's good because most people cut off their connections a little too quick when they transfer as if that'll help any of us."

"Maybe I should." Irvine quirked a smile. "But alas. These are special people."

"You're joining Noel?" Squall asked.

Irvine made a show of surprise. "Is he going, too?"

"They want him to substitute for another teacher over there." Squall folded his arms. "He should be there, now. Maybe they're finally moving beyond firearms."

"I doubt that." Irvine remembered to keep smiling. "They're pretty attached over there."

Squall frowned. "Then why…?"

"Don't ask me." Irvine forced a chuckle. "But I'm sure there's more to Noel than just his swordplay."

"Ellone seems to think so."

"Ellone?" Rinoa asked.

"She seems interested." Squall shook his head. "Couldn't tell you why."

Rinoa put on a sly smile. "Maybe I can play some matchmaker."

"I doubt that it'll be necessary." Irvine let out a slow breath. "Noel doesn't seem like the kind to need help."

"So?"

Squall put a hand on her shoulder. "Leave him alone."

"But she's your sister – aren't you worried about it?"

Squall shrugged. "She can do what she wants."

"I'm all about that freedom," Irvine said, "but it certainly is an odd choice. Doesn't she know there's something wrong with Noel?"

Squall perked up. "I never took you for gossip."

Gossip was one thing – her getting in the way of his mission was another. "He _is _one of our most efficient colleagues and singlehandedly turned the tides on the west quarter."

"But he's on our side," Rinoa said. "Why would that hurt Ellone?"

"Because he knows violence better than any of us." Irvine flashed a smile. "Romantic though that may be, I recommend she keep her distance for now."

Squall shrugged and said nothing. The man knew Noel better than Irvine did, but he couldn't let that bother him. Irvine only had to buy himself a week or two and this would all be past them. He only kind of cared who Ellone fell for in the end.

As long as it wasn't some douchebag like that Seifer Almasy, but he wasn't even here anymore.

… Like Noel would be.

Irvine made his farewell and moved to join the others at the stage again.

He really had to get this assignment out of his mind before it affected his ability to perform.


	3. Chapter 3

_Noel stopped in place when he caught sight of the offender: a girl sitting atop the concrete slab that ran flush with the green earth. "Who…?"_

_The girl twirled the pistol in her hand, grinning widely. "I knew I could find you here! How's the training?"_

_"Training? Who are you?"_

_"Cater, of course!" She stuck her pistol in her leg holster and slapped her hands on her hips. "Kind of slow on the uptake, aren't we?"_

_Noel quirked an eyebrow. "Or maybe you're thinking too fast for your mouth to keep up."_

_"Nah." Cater jumped from her perch and landed before him. "I'd be more concerned with our grip on the timeline. Perhaps we haven't met yet?"_

_Noel remembered their trip to Trabia. "If we did, it was brief."_

_"Aw." Cater flicked him on the nose. "You don't remember the face of every girl that crosses your path? Dang! Not lookin' good for your dating life!"_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"Good to know." She pulled out a phone-like device and wrote something on it. "I'll need that for later meetings."_

_"Meetings?"_

_"Yeah," she said, grabbing him by the arm. "We're going to be spending a lot of time together, you and I. Haven't you put it together yet? Man, you're a god! You don't even belong on this planet!"_

_"Yeah, thanks for that."_

_"Oh, phooey!" Cater yanked him closer. "Don't you want to help Yeul? Reunite with Serah? You remember them, right?"_

_Pink and silver hair. Dying in his arms. "I don't really want to."_

_Cater released him with a groan. "Ugh! You're all so difficult! How can it be so hard to get you back?"_

_"Back from what?"_

_"Space! You all got separated, leaving us to round you up again! We got orders, okay! And if we don't do what we're told, then we may as well kiss this world goodbye!"_

_"Why?"_

_"Oh, come on. You can't expect me to drop the whole story here, do you?"_

_"I do."_

_"Oh." Cater looked thoughtful for a moment. "How best to abridge this?"_

_"Just tell me the shortest version you can."_

_"Okay." Cater took a deep breath. "So, you've been seeing things, right? Maybe talking to yourself a lot…?"_

* * *

Galbadia wasn't all that impressive once Noel saw it fall into view from his position in the train. Its red-tinged walls and structures looked almost alien in their design. Like something he would find on Pulse in all its wild glory. He wondered if it was natural to look that way, or if it was maybe stained with rust.

All too soon, the train stopped and he disembarked with other students and staff to flow through the school's main hall. The students moved in lethargic groups with quiet conversation and slow words. The staff moved quicker, most equipped with steaming cups and energy drinks.

One pack of rifle-toting girls passed him and he caught some discussion on assassination. They talked about means and motivations, but mostly they argued on whether or not it was necessary in most cases.

_Assassination,_ Ellone's voice whispered in his mind.

Noel paused, the sensation of it bringing a memory of serving as bodyguard to the leader of humanity on Pulse in a time that didn't exist. He swallowed, startled at the sensation – was he going to keep remembering things like this again?

Rather than talking through the moment, however, the information uploaded to his mind within the space of a second that felt like compressed years.

He stood by the railing overlooking the city of Academia, its shining towers and beacons serving as symbols of the strength and virtue that the place represented in its people that were so drastically different from his own.

It was refreshing to live in a place where the only thing he had to worry about was the occasional attempt on Hope's life that usually was taken care of by the man himself before Noel even entered the scene.

And if the poor soul that thought to attack Hope survived until Noel arrived, things got worse for them.

"I thought I'd find you out here."

Whispered Cieth. "Hope," Noel said as the other man leaned against the rail beside him, looking as young and healthy as Noel knew him. Not a hint of madness tainted his sunken eyes, though the burden of guiding an entire world showed through the slump in his shoulders.

"I needed a break," Noel said. "From all the politics. Why do I have to go to these meetings? Can't I watch you from a distance like always?"

Hope looked out across the city, the light of which reflected in his eyes. "You can, but I'd like people to see you as a typical office body. Means they don't think to take you out first."

"I wish you wouldn't make sense like that."

Buzzing in his pocket. He snapped out of the memory and returned to the garden with a blink.

Message read that his appointment with the headmaster was delayed until that evening.

Noel shoved the phone away and looked about him. With all that time on his hands, he could have done half a dozen more class sessions back in Balamb. Or taken time to reform that technique he developed for three-or-greater-on-one scenarios.

And instead he found himself stuck in the middle of Galbadia Garden without any clue of where was where and who was who and what was what.

"Great," he whispered to himself. Instinct kicked in and he added, "Can you see me now? Caius? … Yeul?"

No response, as he expected. But he just felt a little closer when he spoke their names. And a small part of him, the same part that still echoed faintly with the Heart of Chaos, whispered a response. "I can."

Funny. It was almost like one of them stood by him and spoke-

"How can you summon me?"

Noel looked and found Caius standing beside him. "I can?"

"Yes. Your voice reached across the Historia Crux and dragged me from my rest. How can you do this?"

"I don't know." Noel looked about them and found a mostly-empty yard. The occasional student passed by with an odd look their way, but otherwise they drew no extra attention. "You're… real?"

"That depends." Caius flexed a covered hand. "But I have not left my realm for pointless trivia. Why do you summon me?"

"I… I don't know. I guess I'm confused and I want to know why I can't remember things like I should. Why I'm here. Do you know how to get to the gates on this world?"

"I know not half the answers you seek, not even your own history. By meddling in the timeline, you cut off your own origin point and dabbled in the warping arts of time distortion. You linked yourself to paradoxes and alternatives now impossible to reach, yet the energy still clings to you like a hungry parasite."

"But you were there with me. In my original life. Right?"

"I was. But I cannot tell you what I did not witness and I did not follow you around like a lovesick pup. Your journey to Valhalla, for instance, I only saw a part of which."

"My journey." Noel felt unsteady on his feet, the sight of Caius before him making it seem as though he wandered through a dream. The sky looked unnatural to him despite its normal shade of blue. "I died, didn't I?"

"How else would a mortal such as yourself make your way through the unseen realm?"

"But I met Serah. We worked together. And I died other times."

"You were granted another life by the Goddess."

"Who?"

Caius put a hand on Noel's shoulder and his first instinct was to shrug him off. But the gesture awoke a hunger in Noel that he didn't know he had. A need for the brotherly touch of the one he looked up to the most. For… approval? "I cannot resolve your curiosity," Caius said, voice a low rumble. "Nor can I save you from your predicament. You sought to fix the timeline and I fought you every step of the way. Despite the obstacles that faced you, you achieved the impossible and proved me wrong.

"But with such power comes a cost, and Serah paid that price with her life. You did not see your own debt to be paid because it came on too gradually to notice. That debt remains and perhaps it is your due to lose all your memory. Would I could take the fall and give up my own that you might hold on to your recollection, but Etro could not save all her champions. Even Yeul still works in recompense. Such is our burden."

Noel planted his feet to keep from toppling over – his head felt light. "All her champions? I thought Lightning played that role?"

"Lightning served as the Savior – a unique position. But Etro has always favored nine."

"Nine?"

"You must find your own answers." Caius stepped away, face hard again. "It is not my place to regale you with such information."

And just like that, he disappeared again. Noel gripped a nearby column for support, a part of him assuming to wake up and snap out of this odd memory.

Only nothing changed. He remained in the yard and students kept moving about him. Someone asked if he was a witch, to which another said Noel was just a famous SeeD from Balamb.

Noel don't know how long he stood there in the yard, thoughts racing. Eventually the lightheadedness faded and he found the strength to find somewhere to settle until his meeting.

When Noel finally made his way through the office building and up to the top floor, he followed nameplates and the occasional request for directions to find Martine's office near the back.

Noel knocked on the door and the man called, "Enter!"

The office itself wasn't much out of the ordinary. The biggest difference between this one and Squall's was the collection of different scopes on the desk and the view from the window that provided a baffling view of the surrounding landscape.

"I hope the trip wasn't too stressful?" asked the man.

Noel swallowed at the windows and took a seat. "Not at all."

"What training are you most comfortable with?"

"Basics, sir. Did you have anything specific in mind for my assignment?"

"Not really, no." Martine leaned forward and clasped his hands under his chin. "But your fame proceeds you. They say you must have left the womb with a dagger in hand going by the way you fight."

"It's an exaggeration, sir."

"No legend comes from nothing." Martine regarded him. "And I'm curious as to the origin of yours."

"Yeah. I'd like to know, too."

"No point in being modest."

"I agree, but really. At the age most students enter at, you can't expect all rumors to carry weight, right?"

"Maybe not." If they just wanted to see Noel perform, then they could have arranged a display in the evening – not days of substitution. "But Irvine should figure out for both of us. Come in, Kinneas."

The door opened to admit a man in a long coat. "Yes, sir."

"Noel is ready for his tour." Martine stood and circled the desk. "You know where to go?"

"Yes, sir."

Martine turned to Noel and gestured toward the guest. "Irvine Kinneas. He'll be your guide around here."

"Nice to meet'cha." The man extended a hand while the other slung a rifle over his shoulder. Noel tensed at the sight of the sleek barrel and trigger that was smaller than a finger.

"Noel." He accepted the gesture. "Kreiss."

"Perfect." Kinneas looked around them. "So, where do you want to go, first?"

"The classrooms." Noel gave Martine a look. "The most important part of the school."

They bid Martine farewell and Kinneas took Noel down the hall.

"You're not planning to kidnap me, are you?" Noel asked once they cleared earshot of the office.

"Nothing so sinister." Kinneas flashed him a warm smile. "They just want to look into your alleged inhuman powers. I would worry more about a raise and fights with Balamb's headmaster."

"If they want me that badly, why should I say no?"

"You shouldn't."

Noel watched windows and doors pass. Classes must not have ended yet, if the empty halls were anything to go by. "I'll consider myself flattered, regardless."

"This is the top-tier, where the higher-grade students go. Each floor reduces in level as you might expect. Pretty straightforward. Now, just between us. Are you _really _partially alien?"

Noel started. "What?"

"That's what people say. Where do you get your powers from?"

"Nowhere. I just train really hard."

"Oh, come on. No system I've heard of could possible render space-warping abilities. How do you create portals without special magic?"

"They're not portals."

"Then what are they?"

Noel sighed and paused, which got Kinneas to stop with him. Noel looked about to make sure no one was listening. "It's magic. Just… special magic."

"Really?" Kinneas raised his brow. "GF?"

"Not quite."

"Still. At least you're a freak for a reason."

"I guess I'll take that as a compliment."

They went through classrooms and fields he could use. Irvine made a point of showing off their antique collection in the main hall and the paintings of their historical accomplishments where a full promenade was built into the walls.

It reminded him of a school he and Serah visited in Academia – something about these places cared so much about how fancy they looked that he forgot to see them as schools so much as museums. Galbadia especially, given the kind of displays they had despite neglected care of the floors and furniture. The small things that betrayed their reduced funding and soured relations with Balamb.

Ultimecia's influence went beyond the immediate threat to life she posed a year ago.

"You've been here your whole life?" Noel asked.

Kinneas nodded. "Save for my trips to Balamb."

"Why the animosity between schools? We both made it out of the fiasco, why not just move on?"

Kinneas chuckled. "I don't think I'm the best person to ask. Philosophy and social economics were never emphasized in my schooling."

He always heard stories of the war that brought down Cocoon, but he always thought it was exaggerated to scare him and Yeul into paying attention. Humanity couldn't afford to divide itself like this and given everything that happened, he thought they would ally themselves if anything.

But maybe people never changed.

* * *

"How is he?" Martine asked.

Irvine kept his eyes on the windows. "He's suspicious."

"Of?"

"Of this transfer. He expects reassignment or intrigue and he's not far off."

Martine tapped a pen against the desk. "I'm buying time. It's not enough yet, but if you can keep it quiet, I should only need another few days."

"If you could just tell me who-"

"That's not an option."

Irvine grit his teeth and turned around. "You guys trained me, you know what I can do." Turned to face his former headmaster. "You don't think I can take out a dirty commissioner?"

"Not this one." Martine didn't meet his gaze and Irvine noted the hints of a healing black eye.

"Wonderful." Irvine felt at the shotgun on his belt. "They have a friend of yours?"

"I can't answer that."

"Right." Irvine walked toward the door. "I'll get this figured, Headmaster."

Martine said nothing before the door shut and Irvine found himself back in Galbadia's hallways.

Middle of the day. Students would be filtering in and out of the diners and cafeteria for at least another hour. Noel might join the crowd… or he might not.

Irvine would get a pulse on his habits by the end of the day.

It took some subtle questions and a lot of peeking through doors, but he finally found the man on the lawn outside, staring off into the distance like he just went through a bad breakup.

"Hey." Irvine used his best saunter. Gotta be careful to use Galbadian tricks instead of the Balamb stuff that Noel would recognize. "How'd your first class go?"

Noel didn't look up. "They wanted to get more advanced than they could wrap their heads around."

"Ain't that just the way." Irvine took a seat beside him and watched the trees move with the wind. "You didn't bring your lunch?"

"Didn't eat."

Irvine filed that away. "The pasta here is renowned across the nation. You should try it while you're here."

"Yeah."

Time to get pushy. "You prefer Balamb?"

Noel hesitated. "I guess. I've been to Galbadia before, so…"

"But you know people from here, right?"

"No."

"Give me _something_, man. You're all zoned out – what's up?"

Noel opened his mouth. Closed it again. "Ellone."

Irvine paused. "Oh, great. You're in love with her?"

"What? No! It's just… she was acting weird the other day shortly before I passed out."

"You passed out?"

"Yeah, long story. But she was the last thing I saw and it felt… strange."

"That _isn't _being in love?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

Irvine groaned. "Well, shoot. Why don't you just go back? I can't separate you two." Maybe he could buy them some time…

"What do you mean, 'separate?'"

"Squall says Ellone thinks the same about you. I guess it was meant to be."

"No, that's not…" Noel hesitated. "I don't _think _that's what it is."

"Then I don't think you've ever been in love. When you can't take your thoughts off someone, that's usually the first sign. You know, along with the denial."

"I'm not in _love_-"

"No, you're just thinking about her and moping on the lawn and not eating because she's got that dark hair and mysterious eyes and _Odin_, man, why do you do this to me? You're like, twenty years old! That's a good decade past when you were supposed to learn what falling for someone is like!"

"… That doesn't make sense."

"To prudes like you, sure." Irvine slumped over. "But by golly, I shouldn't have to explain this. Maybe that's why Squall sent you away… didn't want you messing around with his sister."

Noel's eyes glazed over. "Sister."

"Yeah, they were raised together or something. I guess you didn't know."

"She could be your sister."

"No, it – wait, what?"

"She would like that."

"I'm not following you, man."

Noel leaned forward, though his eyes remained unfocused. "Serah's that kind of person, you know. She would take in everyone as her family, given a choice."

"Who's Serah?"

"Yeah, but she doesn't see you that way."

"Noel?" Irvine moved around to see him from the front and waved his hand in front of the man's face. No reaction. Not even a blink.

"We're not alone, Hope. Left behind, maybe, but Lightning's out there watching and Serah could walk through the door any day now. Sazh and Snow and Dajh… I don't know about them."

It was like listening to someone talk in their sleep, only more coherent. Irvine leaned in and watched Noel's eyes. They didn't move in the slightest twitch and Irvine shifted to block the sun from reaching them. Didn't want the guy to come out of this blind.

"Interesting," Irvine whispered. Poked the man in the forehead and got no response. Noel just kept up his side of the conversation that was the only side Irvine heard.

Noel asked after this "Hope's" health and talked about politics and shared personal history and something about the end of the world and death of their friends.

Irvine settled in to watch him. Maybe he should have seen it as an invasion of the man's privacy but he couldn't bring himself to look away. And what else would he do? Leave him to go blind? Carry him inside and attract more unwanted attention?

Noel betrayed some vulnerability when talking to this unseen man and shared feelings about someone lost long ago. Irvine jotted down as many names as possible in his notebook to look up later.

How long they sat there, he lost track. The sun eventually faded beyond the horizon and they were left in the dark of the evening – hopefully they didn't miss any of Noel's classes.

Eventually the conversation faded out and Noel blinked.

Looked at Irvine and his face fell.

Irvine leaned back and used his hands to prop himself up. "I guess we're all weird in our own ways."

Noel shook his head and stood. "That's personal."

"Oh, I know. But I think I can understand remembering things that others don't."

Pause. "How do you know about that?"

"It's either a memory or a very creative and vivid dream. And you're not acting like it's a dream. So, who's Serah and Hope?"

Noel sighed and sat back down. "Friends. It's weird – I haven't remembered anything new in a long time and suddenly I've got these buried moments popping up out of nowhere."

"You're not the only one. I used to think people I knew in Balamb wouldn't remember my knowing them beforehand, but GF forces don't take everything permanently. You must have used it more than you realized."

Noel quirked an eyebrow. "Galbadia doesn't touch the stuff."

"Nah. That's how my past remains safe and sound."

"Mine should be, too."

"You don't use it?"

"Never have. Never needed to. I've got… other reserves."

"Like your space powers?"

"… Yeah. Like those."

Irvine hummed and looked toward the sky. "Do you believe in reincarnation?"

"I've never thought about it."

"Maybe it's something like that."

A buzz in his pocket and Irvine pulled out his phone. He answered, "Kinneas" and gave Noel his best apologetic face.

"Irvine!" Selphie's voice. "Zell got exploded!"

"What, you all playing with fireworks without me?"

"No, he's in the hospital and we don't know why but he's bleeding really bad!"

Irvine froze. "What happened?"

"I just said I don't know!"

Swore under his breath and stood. Noel asked, "What's that about?"

"I gotta go." Irvine hung up and a message popped up from Martine. _Remember the time, Kinneas._

"Anything I can-?"

Irvine broke into a run and left Noel confused.


	4. Chapter 4

_Noel tripped and saw a forest beneath him for a split second._

_He hit the tile floor, hands first, and scrambled back to his feet. Someone touched his shoulder, and Noel turned, expecting to see that pink-haired girl. Instead, Quistis' unamused face met his._

_"You can't expect me to leave you alone."_

_He sighed. "This isn't something I can drag you into, Trepe. I don't think it's anything like what you've worked with before."_

_"So?"_

_"So, I don't want to get you involved in anything dangerous."_

_She let out a short laugh. "You? Worried about me? About me getting involved in something dangerous? Did you miss the part where I saved the world last year?"_

_"It's not like that." Noel shoved away from her and brushed at where she touched him, as if that could rid him of the strange memory that accompanied the motion._

_"Noel."_

_He snapped out of his reverie. Quistis stared at him, brows knit together. "You don't look like you've slept in days."_

_"Maybe I haven't."_

_"I could call the nurse."_

_"I'll figure it out. Probably just need to have some tea before bed tonight or something. It'll be fine."_

_"You keep saying that."_

* * *

Another day in Galbadia.

Noel looked to the clock that read four in the morning. He slipped in and out of sleep for the past few hours and he knew better than to keep trying until six. Which meant he had two hours to kill.

Two hours doing what?

He cleaned up, got dressed, and shouldered his swords. Stopped at the door with lingering doubt.

He gave up on finding Cater a long time ago, and it wasn't like there was much left of his previous life that he could hunt down in memory. Irvine left for Balamb yesterday and wouldn't be back for a couple days at least.

So, he started off with a lap around the school.

But while the exercise cleared his mind, he couldn't help thinking about memories. He thought he remembered everything, but somehow Ellone triggered something else. Maybe she could do that again.

He stopped near a pond, pulled out his phone and dialed.

"Hello?"

"Ellone?" Noel hesitated. He didn't think about how to word it… "I – you helped when I passed out the other day."

"Oh. No, that was nothing." Her voice was soft and she sounded normal. The way she acted before must have been part of his illusion, then.

"I never thanked you, though."

"You don't need to."

"But I want to." He looked about at the red-dappled path. "I also-… you mentioned feeling like the only person left in the world. What did you mean by that?"

"Um." She took a while to respond. "I don't know. I just get caught up in my thoughts, sometimes. Find my own little world. Why?"

Nothing sparked at her words. He paced around. "You don't remember things that never happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"Never mind. It's been an odd week for me."

A breath of a laugh on the other end. "I can relate to odd weeks. Zell is supposed to be such a source of energy, but he's barely moving."

"Will he be okay?"

"I think so. But it'll take time and he's upset about it. You know how he is."

"I wish I knew better."

"… Right, I forget you don't know them as well as I do. I guess I know a lot of things that others don't."

"What makes you say that?"

Hum of thought. "I dream of academia, sometimes. You?"

He thought of white and glistening skyscrapers. Took a moment to realize she referred to education. "I'm more of a soldier, myself."

"That's not what I-"

"Yo, Kreiss!"

Noel turned to find Seifer approaching. "I gotta go."

"Okay, but-"

He clicked off and pocketed the phone. "Almasy? I thought you were dead?"

"An exaggerated rumor."

"One you didn't bother correcting?"

"Not until now." Seifer pointed the tip of his sword Noel's way. "Fight me one on one. To the death."

"No dinner first?" Noel frowned at the blade leveled toward his throat. "Isn't that a little much?"

"Will you do it or not?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't like killing people."

Seifer snorted. "And trained assassins call you a role model? Stop kidding yourself – we've all been killers since the moment we stepped inside this place." He took a stance. "No point in fighting the very thing you were raised to be."

The man was serious. Noel hesitated. "I wasn't raised this way."

"Yeah, right."

"I mean it." Noel put his hands up. "I don't want this."

Seifer hesitated, eyes flickering to the sword on Noel's back. "I don't believe you."

"And I don't believe you. You don't go picking fights with people over nothing – Squall's supposed to be your rival, isn't he?"

Seifer dropped his weapon. "I'm not an idiot, Kreiss."

"That's debatable."

"Squall's become relevant." Seifer's fingers clenched and unclenched around the hilt of his gunblade and his shoulders shook with each breath. "Are you gonna focus on the matter at hand or what?"

Something felt off. Noel scowled. "I'll fight you, but not to the death."

"Oh, come on, man!" Seifer threw his hand back. "Where's the fun in a duel?"

"Where's the fun in dying?"

"Honor and immortality left in your legacy!"

"Fine." Noel dropped into a half-crouch. "If it means that much to you."

Seifer readied his gunblade, though there was no relief to the motion. "It means the world."

Noel reached for the space around him, felt the current of here flow into there and nudged the flow of his vicinity_._ It sprung at his touch like spring earth after rain.

Seifer straightened and gestured for Noel to go first.

He took the invitation. Switched his swords into a lance and jumped.

Seifer brought up his blade and shot. Noel took the bullet and flipped it around. It slammed into a nearby tree.

Confusion for the briefest moment before Noel closed in and Seifer snapped back to attention. Whipped out his blade in time to block Noel's attack.

Lance bounced off sword and Noel rolled away. Seifer aimed again and Noel changed the direction of the bullet downward into the dirt.

Seifer swore.

Noel flipped his lance about and broke it back into two. Seifer's frustration gave him away and Noel took the opening to break through and engage.

Seifer reacted… not sluggishly. Noel knew the man to be above average in performance among the schools before he went rogue, but in the enhancement Etro provided, Seifer could have just woken from a nap.

Noel took ground and forced Seifer back. Despite the advantage, Noel struggled to take over. There was a frantic motion to Seifer's attacks that kept Noel from finding a comfortable pattern.

Seifer didn't follow the same rules as everyone else and something stressed him.

Noel switched to defensive and that slowed Seifer down. The guy was rattled and Noel doubted this was about one lousy duel for attention.

Switched back to offensive and finally gained ground.

Exhaustion won out and Seifer slowed. The butt of Noel's sword connected with Seifer's shoulder and a sickening crack sounded.

Seifer cried out and Noel kicked him to the ground. Stuck the tip of his sword out to keep him down.

Bit the inside of his lip and held his breath against the pounding in his chest. Images of Caius flashed through his mind, and he could feel again his blade breaking through layers of flesh and bone without touching the man in front of him.

"No." Noel lowered his blade.

"What?" Seifer stumbled away from him. "Are you _kidding_ me?"

Noel sheathed his sword. "I don't take lives."

"That defeats the whole point!" Seifer threw himself to his feet as Noel turned. "Don't walk away from me!"

Noel walked on as Seifer yelled behind him.

* * *

Irvine hated the smell of antiseptic and plastic – hospitals reminded him of visiting colleagues after missions gone awry and the awful feeling of being just unfamiliar enough to not know what to say or how to help. Or when colleagues hurt themselves and he wanted to make it better but there was nothing he could do.

Standing before Zell, who was hooked up to too many tubes and cables, left a bigger pit in his stomach. At least in those previous scenarios, he wasn't to blame.

"Hey," Irvine said before taking a seat by his bedside. "How are you feeling?"

Zell pulled open a lazy eye and asked with a raspy voice, "Where's Ma?"

"She went to get you some food." Irvine couldn't help searching for the bullet hole, but there were enough bandage wrappings over Zell's chest to hide any evidence. "Pretty lazy of them to go for the torso, of course."

Zell managed a grin. "Yeah. Man, if you did it, I wouldn't be here, right?"

"Well." Irvine cleared his throat and adjusted his hat. "I wouldn't go shooting at you, would I? I'm smarter than that."

"Duh." Zell adjusted himself to better face Irvine. "I wonder who _was _that stupid."

"You didn't see them?"

"No. Doctor says it wasn't a bullet, either. Really weird, right?"

"… Yeah."

"But I'll get a cool scar out of this, right? I'll bet you the chicks will come running."

Irvine barely thought past the fog in his head. "Scars make a poor substitute for gentlemanly manners. Treat a lady right and there's nothing you can do to keep them away."

Zell looked thoughtful. "I guess that works for you, huh? Maybe I should take lessons from the champ."

"No one knows better than myself."

They continued in shallow conversation – Zell seemed to appreciate the chance to catch up despite his condition – but Irvine couldn't bring himself to focus. Whoever attacked Zell didn't use a gun, so they couldn't be Galbadian. Not entirely at least. Was the commissioner from Balamb, then? Except that it didn't sound like any magic that Squall or his friends employed.

Unless it was the work of a gunblade. That would explain missing any vital organs.

Eventually Zell slipped back into sleep and his mother came in. Irvine took that as his chance to slip away.

The halls passed him in a blur.

Either he stayed here and made their commissioner suspicious or he returned to Galbadia to get this mission done before more of his friends got hurt.

… Unless this was Seifer's doing.

Irvine caught the first train to Galbadia and dialed up Squall for info on his old rival. Squall was busy and hard to contact these days, but Irvine knew how to get around the receptionist and achieve an easy connection to the office. It rang out for minutes before the line finally connected.

"Leonhart's office," came the flat response.

"Heyo, friend." Irvine paced the hall he found himself in. "You said Seifer died, right?"

"He should've. Good riddance."

"Yeah, no one's gonna complain about that. But who else besides you two do the whole gunblade thing?"

"Ask the record keepers."

"Come on, Squall. You both paid a lot of attention to who all crept into your territory – I'm sure you noticed when someone threatened y'all's rivalry. Gunblade isn't exactly an amateur's sport, right?"

"Not really."

"But you don't remember anyone even trying it?"

"It's isn't a small school."

"Gotcha." Irvine promptly hung up and made for the train station.

Even Squall would've remembered something if there was someone like that. Much as he dismissed Seifer for his juvenile behavior, that tension they had should have marked anyone that threatened such a – dare he call it a bond?

Nah. More of a special connection.

It didn't take long to reach Galbadia and hear of the fight that broke out between in the courtyard.

Lo and behold, the man attacked Noel while Irvine was out. After that, he just had to trace the air of arrogance to its source. Irvine found him walking the halls on the top floor of the building.

"Seifer!"

The man didn't look back at his name, but also didn't speed up or try to get away.

Irvine grabbed Seifer on the shoulder and spun him about. Fingered his shotgun. "You'd better not be Martine's commissioner!"

Seifer regarded him with narrowed eyes. "I don't have to answer to you, Kinneas."

"Then you work for Galbadia, too, don't you?" Irvine flipped out his phone and pulled up the number from Martine. Flashed it to Seifer. "You know them."

"So what?"

"They enlisted me, too." Irvine forced a breath and acted like he wasn't compromising his friends' lives. "They're desperate enough to kill Noel that they hired both of us in case one didn't work out. What did they threaten you with?"

Seifer snarled. "That's none of your business."

"I think if you shot my friend, then it's become my business."

"I didn't want to."

"But you did!" Irvine shoved him back. "You shot Zell! _Several times_!"

"He didn't die."

"And I should thank you for that?"

"What was I supposed to do, huh?" Seifer pushed him back with surprising force. "If it was another man, they might have killed him! But I was generous enough to give that retard a fighting chance!"

"I don't care. I'm not going to let them kill my friends, and I sure as hell ain't gonna let them play me into killing Noel for them."

"And what do you have in mind, Kinneas? Asking them politely?"

"Not quite." Irvine looked about them and guided Seifer further in. "We can find them. Between us, we can make this end, can't we?"

A twitch in Seifer's lip. "I would like that."

"I don't know about you, but I'm not going to let these people think they can use me as a puppet." He allowed too much of that already. "Noel doesn't deserve that."

"Speak for yourself." Seifer turned on his heel. "That man can choke in his sleep for all I care."

"Aren't you going to tell me what you _do _want?"

"No."

"Oh, come on!" Irvine followed. "These guys, whoever they are, are bad news! Are you going to let them sully the schools' reputations after everything that's happened already? Do you really consider that fair?"

"You don't choose what's fair, Kinneas."

"No, but you do!"

Seifer paused. "So?"

"You're a lot of things, but compliant isn't one of those, is it?"

"Who says I'm taking this lying down?"

Irvine drew up short. "What?"

Seifer turned to face him. "If you thought I was going to let these people get away with their bullshit, then you're an idiot. Wait, you're an idiot anyway."

"Then you'll go after them?"

"Not like I'll tell _you_." Seifer turned away again, but Irvine kept pace with him.

"Why not?"

"Cause I don't like you."

"But we could stop them together!"

"I could stop them myself!"

"It would be easier with both of us!"

Seifer spun on his heel and slammed Irvine into the wall.

Pain erupted in his skull and breath fled him. Seifer released him immediately, but Irvine barely held himself upright.

"Don't force yourself into this!" Seifer was close enough that Irvine made out the faintest scent of alcohol. "My crew doesn't need anyone but _me_, got it?"

"Maybe they don't." It was hard to speak past the pain in his lungs. "But I need help. My friends do. They don't know what I've gotten into and they don't know the target on their heads."

Seifer's lip twitched in a snarl. "Then maybe you shouldn't have accepted the mission."

"What, did you get a choice? Cause I sure didn't."

"I don't want your problems."

"And I don't want to share them." Irvine forced himself to his feet and looked Seifer in the eyes. "Especially not with a master-less mercenary. But I'm willing to compromise for the lives of those I care about."

Seifer threw up a hand and turned away. "Fine! But don't come crying to me when it's over!"

Irvine groaned. This wasn't going to be an easy partnership, but he supposed it was still progress.


	5. Chapter 5

_"What?"_

_Cater placed a hand on her hip, eyes shadowing. "The gate isn't here, yet," she said. "You've already remembered, so it's weird that it hasn't cropped up, but there isn't a lot of point in me sticking around until it shows up and Queen wants me getting work done on another planet."_

_Noel gawked. "So you're just going to _leave_?"_

_She put a hand in the air in a mild shrug. "What else do you expect? Am I supposed to babysit you until whenever it is that a portal comes back? Look, time works differently for us. All I gotta do is hop over to Valhalla, get done whatever it is that Queen wants, then get my data and come back here. I'm sure there's a gate out there somewhere, but it must be buried or something. I'd take you through the afterlife or something like they do on Spira, but that's not healthy for a mortal to do on a regular basis."_

_"How long? When will I get back to the others?"_

_"Soon." Cater pulled her gun from her holster. "Take this, okay? I can't go for long without it, so take it as a token of assurance that I'll be back before you know it."_

_Noel reluctantly accepted it. "I'll hold you to your word."_

_"Just keep low, okay? I don't want to come back to find your school demolished or you dead or something stupid like that, okay? The paperwork in Valhalla is worse than in life!"_

_"Paperwork?"_

_"Oh, come on." Cater gave him a suffering look. "Don't pretend you don't know. Anyway." She turned on her heel. "I swear it won't be more than a few days, assuming the gates work the way they're supposed to when I get them back up and running."_

_She disappeared into the night, waving a hand behind her. Noel wondered how she managed to get between worlds without those gates._

* * *

Noel leaned over the basin in the men's room, water dripping from his nose and hair. In the mirror, he looked the same as always. Couple tiny scars near the chin where he hit the generators in that one mission, discoloration on the wrist from another sabotage, and loose bands that wrapped around his neck for feeling closer to his heritage.

Uniform was mussed in places and wrinkled in others – the scuffle with Seifer left him out of sorts.

But why? Students like him got impulsive and did strange things sometimes, there was nothing to read into there. Everyone saw him as a target to bolster their bragging rights and he was okay with that.

But Seifer… Seifer wasn't worried about bragging. More on taking lives.

The guy was troubled, Noel knew, but that was just… weird.

"Hey-ho!" Arms wrapped around his neck in a chokehold and Noel stumbled backward. "Long time no see, man!"

"_Cater_?"

She released him and stepped back. "Yeah! I said I'd be back, didn't I?"

Noel struggled to find his balance. "_Years ago_! I thought you were gone for good!"

"…Oh." Cater looked him up and down. "Oi. I guess you _did _grow up a little. Older than Serah now, I guess?"

Noel grabbed a towel and dried off. "Not quite. You better explain yourself."

"Yeah, yeah." Cater gestured. "So there's a bunch of people out there, right? Travelers, would-be gods, displaced spirits, all the like. And there's ways for them to move, like through dead paths, portals, etc. But those aren't official and have side effects and-"

"What about the gates?" Noel dropped the towel. "We're supposed to use _those_."

"Right. But the thing with these other paths is that they can interfere with our gates. Etro's the only one meant to meddle with time and space, and with her gone we gotta deal with those who want to get into the black box and mess with all the stuff they're not supposed to mess with."

"How did that keep you busy for four years?"

"If you'll let me finish! Geez! How did I get stuck with the whiny kid, huh? There was a frickin' mess up, okay? Someone jostled the stream and my path got jumbled. I technically found you, but it was in an alternate reality where I didn't belong! Took a while to get that sorted out, you know. You should owe me. Though it did explain how I met you without your realizing."

A male student entered the bathroom and froze at the sight of Cater. She didn't notice.

"And that's ignoring the fact that Bhunivelze's kidnapping people left and right and breaking down some of the most important people from the different worlds. Normally, I wouldn't care about that because it's not our problem. But you know what the Dead Council thinks about it? Not good things. And you know how important it is for them to like us? Not much at the moment, but you never know!"

Noel gestured for the student to continue. He did.

"And now they're interfering in everything we do! Do you have any idea how frustrating it is when we've got people blocking our path because some spooky ghost tells them to? What's up with that?"

The student moved to the sink and washed his hands faster than Noel had seen anyone do.

"So that, in addition to the meddling travelers, has been giving us a huge headache. It's taking way longer to get you all together and Lightning's getting antsy. At least, I think that's what Queen said – our communication's gone all out of whack. Because we needed that, too."

The student left and Noel finally put up a hand. "I should tell you-"

"I'm not done. Because you know what happened to your good friend Hope?"

"I'm not going."

"He got-… what?"

"I'm not going."

"What do you mean you're not going?"

"Exactly what I said."

"Oh, if that's just-" Cater groaned and kicked at the tile. "Well, that's just dandy. Hey, Bhunivelze, you want to take the whole universe while you're at it? It's free! No strings attached! Because _there's nothing left in it_!"

"Bhunivelze won't destroy the universe."

"Not deliberately, no. But he doesn't get how souls work! It may as well be empty by the time he's done because there's _souls to inhabit _it! Let me explain something." Cater leaned against a stall. "Little story here, okay?"

Noel rolled his eyes but didn't stop her.

"Mwynn is the oldest being out there, right? She's effectively the top of our hierarchy, the biggest boss or god you can find out there. Because of that, she has to split her power twelve ways and we match that and we've been prepared for it and all that nonsense. But Bhunivelze's her kid, so he's not _quite _as powerful – don't ask me how he managed to hurt her so bad – so he needs at least eight."

"So find another eighth."

"That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that they need this many inheritors and those inheritors _count_. The universe doesn't go and pick eight random warm bodies and say, 'oh, that's good. I'll stick my dangerous and crazy powers in those guys.' No, you guys have been prepared for a long time to take on the power, and without you, it's not going to work."

"Kind of a stupid thing, then, to assume those guys will accept it."

"I won't disagree with you there."

He bit his cheek. "And what if _this_ guy doesn't have a place there?"

"He does." Cater dropped back onto her feet. "And it's time for me to bring him home where he belongs, Noel. Will you let me do that?"

The thought of calling Valhalla "home" left a twisting sensation in his gut. "Maybe."

"Think about it." Cater stepped closer. "I know we're as good as strangers now, but we'll have all the time in creation to change that. You can _make _your place where you want it. I'll bet Cinque and Ace will like you. Also Deuce because she has a thing for broken people."

"I'm not broken."

"Maybe not. But she'll like you anyway." Cater placed a hand on his forehead.

Noel backpedaled but she stayed with him. "What are you doing?"

"Just checking something." Cater closed her eyes and they darted back and forth under her eyelid. "Only just getting a hold of the power Mwynn gave me, after all."

Noel hesitated, stiff and uncomfortable, and used one hand to support himself against the counter behind him. Something about her touch brought a haze of not-quite memories across the surface and he zoned out like a last-year cadet thinking of all the things he would do once he was out of here. Only instead of the future, he thought of the recent past. The last year in which Cater was gone and…

She wanted the latest stuff first and then combed backward. She retrieved hundreds of moments and emotions and… shoot, he felt a wave of self-consciousness at how exposed he was to her prodding.

Eventually Cater wrenched her eyes back open. "There's some odd stuff in there. Not to mention a bunch of ugly holes. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Not really, but it's not like I can just go take a nap."

"Fair point." Cater stepped away again and Noel breathed. "But we can give you plenty of time to rest in Valhalla. I might come back here at some point to investigate some of that stuff you saw because there's no way you're supposed to remember that."

"The alternate timeline you mentioned?"

"Exactly." Cater folded her arms. "I don't like this."

"I don't either." Noel gave a long sigh and pushed away from the counter. "But I want to talk to Quistis first."

"Fine. And in the meantime I'll get back to Valhalla and get some real work done."

He put some distance between them. Walked out to that hall with the history paintings and the promenade. This place would probably look magnificent with a little money and management.

Tapped his phone against his hip.

Pulled it up and stared at the number pad. Four buttons.

Looked away from the number pad and took a few steps toward the exit. Could leave Cater here, take some time to think… be alone again…

But the phone. Those buttons. Quistis. Just had to dial and the explanation would be through within minutes. She would understand.

Those paintings. He never knew anything like those on Pulse, but Serah and the others would.

Distracted again. Just gotta dial those buttons.

A sleight hand slipped over the phone and Noel snapped his attention up to see Ellone smiling at him.

When did-?

Her mouth twitched, but her eyes didn't blink and… was she breathing? He didn't see her chest or stomach move.

He remembered to talk. "Can I… help you?"

"Yes." She breathed. A sudden motion that shook her whole body. Her voice echoed in the hall, but not like his did.

Noel took a step back, but she took him by the wrist. "Um, I don't know how, but-…."

"Everything." She pulled him close and he stumbled. Her eyes fluctuated green. "You are _everything_ I need."

Her grip was so flimsy, he could break her wrists and twist her arms in circles in the time it took to say, "Excuse me," and leave.

But he didn't want to. She smelled like windy plains and the everblooming of spring.

Thoughts raced, sluggish. Like he ran in a drunken stupor through a fog. "What's-…?"

She grinned and it split her face, showed all her pearly teeth that glimmered_. _She leaned in and he felt her breath warm on his face.

Hot.

Chills down his spine.

Her nose almost touched his. "I could stab you right here," she whispered, "and no one would know."

"Class." Noel's tongue felt too large for his mouth. "Students would see."

"No, I mean that they wouldn't know that it was me. See, Ellone never knew what she agreed to. Too soft. I almost feel bad for using her."

He swayed on the spot, almost lost his footing. He couldn't leave, not if there was another Ultimecia. "Sorceress-"

She barked out a laugh and stepped back. The fog didn't go away. "Not even close, hunter boy."

Not just any hunter. The last hunter. He opened his mouth to correct her, but he struggled to move. Knees buckled and he collapsed to the ground.

"It'll wear off in a moment and you can tell your friend everything." Ellone kneeled before him, eyes level with his. "But until then, I want you to think of me. Can you do that?"

So foggy. Limbs weak. Think of Ellone.

"Think of me, with the hair and voice of my original self. Think of me suffocating under rubble and wanting nothing more than the chance for a normal life. Think of Caius' sword through your spine and the world I sent you to. Think of blood-red skies and dead sand."

Spinning off-course through the Historia Crux and landing on stone to meet Caius. Struggling under the man's power and pain in his back and reeling through his last memories before…

He looked up despite his head feeling like a hunk of lead and found Ellone gone.

His last memories before going to Valhalla. His final moments on earth before Serah found him. But Serah… she saw the symbolism. She saw what he wanted her to see. What he wanted _himself _to see.

Fell on his side and groaned.

Wandering Pulse's sands for months and even years, fighting off the occasional monster… he remembered the sweet taste of death.

Before he met Lightning.

Before Etro chose him to save humanity.

Before he remembered his purpose.

Noel snapped his eyes open, forced a hand under him. Heaved himself into a sitting position and pulled out his phone.

He still had a purpose.

And he dialed Quistis' number.

* * *

Seifer whirled in the wheeled chair that Irvine made the mistake of offering him.

"How are we supposed to get at this guy?" Seifer asked. "It's not like they left a trail of breadcrumbs."

"Not breadcrumbs." Irvine scrolled through Martine's messages. "But there's a path out there – there always is."

"Not that you could shoot it if there was."

"I have a better chance than you, Mr. I-use-a-sword-as-my-gun."

"The gunblade is a unique and specialized weapon. It takes brains to learn."

"Then how did-? Wait."

Seifer wheeled his way to look at the phone. "Found something?"

Irvine groaned. "Not really. The messages contain a unique signature, but it's encrypted. Unless you happened to take some of those advanced intelligence classes?"

"I had better things to do." Seifer snatched the phone from him. "But I listened in sometimes when I got bored."

"What about those better things to do?"

Seifer ignored him. "I need an hour at least. When are you supposed to take the shot?"

"Soon as possible."

"Idiot. Why didn't you ask me about this days ago?"

"How was I supposed to know-? Forget it. I can go take a shot and miss. Might buy us some time without threatening our friends."

"Do it." Seifer wheeled away with the phone and pulled a small, pointy tool out of his coat. "Just give me that hour."

Irvine hesitated. "That… should be possible."

"You hesitated."

"Because it depends on how long it takes to find him and I haven't memorized his habits yet and-"

"And this is why you wusses couldn't handle Ultimecia."

"Oh, shut up." Irvine stood. "You better be fast."

"Faster than your butt fries when Trepe finds out what's going on."

* * *

Noel held the phone to his ear. It rang out. The hall was empty of students and he didn't think she would get lost.

Tried again and waited three or four rings before it finally connected.

"Took you long enough," Noel said. "I thought I would die of abandonment."

"Ha, ha." Quistis yawned. "Very funny. What warrants a call at this time of day?"

"… It's seven o'clock."

"Exactly."

"Right." Noel looked about him – the room still swirled with color. Leaned over and closed his eyes. "Cater's back."

Silence on the other end for a long moment. "… And?"

"And she's ready to leave. I could hop through a gate and be gone by the end of the day."

"Is that what you want to do?"

"No."

"You'd prefer to stay?"

"I'm doing good here. And you agreed with that just the other day."

"I did. But… I've also had spirits arguing with me, Noel. There's something going on out there that's more important than the success of a few students and I'm starting to think we shouldn't dismiss it so easily."

"What about protecting people here? I'm sure I landed on this planet for a reason."

"I'm sure you did. But there's honestly not much you could do for us by yourself anymore."

Words died in his throat.

"… I can't tell you what to do. I don't know what Cater says or what happened in your previous life or how any of this comes together. But just… don't throw it away, okay? Sleep on it."

"I _have _slept on it." Noel pressed a palm to his forehead against a building headache. "And that's what tells me I should stay. I don't want to return to desolation."

"Is that really what waits for you? Is that all there is?"

"… Valhalla."

"Odin's home?"

"That's not… no." Noel stood. His head pounded. "It's the place I'm supposed to go. It's…"

"Where Cater's from?"

"Yeah, but…" He doubled over. His vision cleared, but why did it _hurt? _"I don't want to go back there."

"Why not?"

Caius' blood in his hands, Etro's heart in his chest, Serah cold in his arms. "Because of what I might become."

"And what is that?"

"A killer."

* * *

It was a clear setup. Irvine fingered his rifle and watched Noel converse with Quistis. The two weren't even as close as he thought they should be for everything they connected together on, but something about the demeanor between them today set him on edge. Such animated motions would make a precise shot difficult.

But he could wait.

Irvine adjusted his grip, calibrated the sights, and settled in.

* * *

The phone in his hand showed the same message they'd been staring at for days. Kinneas bought him time by going out to take a shot at Kreiss, but he still couldn't waste a moment.

He scoured the message itself several times over, but no words or patterns matched what they taught in Balamb. No encoded hints or secret combinations. No-…

Seifer paused. Looked to the borders. At first glance, there was nothing unusual about them, but it would kill the point of encryption to make something obviously off. Kinneas swore on his life that Aquamar knew what he was talking about, and if there wasn't anything in the message itself, then that left the framing. Or maybe the software it was sent in.

He moved the phone around in the light. Nothing but some odd-looking bars, but those were typical in a program like this.

Though these ones _did _look different. There were more of them in irregular patterns.

He broke out of the user interface and entered the code to break out of the operating system's UI and into the black box.

* * *

The pain eased. Noel let out a breath.

"You sound distracted."

"I'm fine."

"The hell you are."

Lowered himself into one of the chairs. "I don't want to go back. I want to help people. I want to make a difference, even if it means death because I'd rather die with a purpose than live without."

"But you'll have that on the other side, too. Your friends that you mentioned – don't you want to see them again? Don't you want to help _them_?"

"They've always managed without me."

Quiet. "… Have they?"

"Yes." Even Serah. "They have each other and I-…" Had no one. Unless he chased down Yeul and look where that got him last time. "There's nothing for me to do there."

* * *

Noel took a guarded stance and his motions turned harsh and quick. Irvine took time to read those lips and make out words of honesty, concern, and short-tempered insults.

This was the moment – they were distracted. Noel would never see him. Though Quistis might connect the dots, it wouldn't be until she called Galbadia some time later.

Irvine licked his dry lips, felt the trigger. Imagined the gun going off and the smoke that would fill his nose. In the moment, he forgot the air freshener and the running water in the distance – all he could see was Noel's head.

After he did this, he would probably find somewhere quiet and isolated, safe from the interaction of other people and creatures. He would find somewhere where they wouldn't find him for hours and he would set his rifle against him, point to his chin. He would pull the trigger and never do anything like this again.

* * *

His eyes itched.

Seifer stopped breathing. Looked around to find a fog about the room that distorted the light coming in from the window.

_Shit._

Jumped to his feet, but his legs felt like paper and the floor like shifting sand. Dropped to his knees and held himself up with shaking hands. His head felt light as a feather and his fingers numb.

The door opened, but he couldn't look up to see it. His limbs lost feeling and he hit the ground.

"I warned both of you, I swear."

_Ellone's _muffled voice. But another overlapped with hers, a sharp voice that sneered with too much confidence. That wasn't right.

"Oh, dear, gone and lost our functionality, have we? Whatever shall we do? It's almost like you looked for a back door into your commissioner's whereabouts. Not like it matters – I'll have my vengeance eventually."

Lithe hands pulled him onto his back and Seifer forced his eyes up to see Ellone in a gas mask. "I'll put you away for now, I guess."

* * *

"I _matter _here!" Noel stepped toward the stairs. "In Balamb, I mean!"

The response bled with desperation, "Of course, you do! And I would hate to see you leave, but I also care about our _universe_! Honestly, I trust Cater more than I trust the dead and I trust _you _even more! We're standing on the brink of something horrible and I don't want you benched when it happens!"

"I'm not going on another pointless chase! I'm not going to Vahalla again! I'm not wandering aimless for years!"

"Who says that'll happen?"

"I do! I've experienced it once and I will again!"

* * *

Sweat on his hands. He took a moment to smell his environment again, memorize the faint salt and smoke that wafted in from the café area.

He could do it. This wasn't Edea all over again. He learned from last time and he was the best Galbadia had. He knew how to do his job. He knew how to take a shot and get out before anyone ever noticed. He knew how to collect information on terrain and building layouts and how to never leave a trace.

Hair tickled the side of his face, but Irvine forgot it. The shot was clear. His fingers were steady despite the perspiration, and he could have this all over in less than a second.

Swallowed. His heart hammered in his chest, but he didn't care about that. He only cared about Noel and the argument he was having with Quistis.

* * *

Seifer distantly registered the stretcher she lifted him onto. His thoughts were so sluggish – barely caught the words she gave passing students and staff.

"Pardon me! I need to get this man to the medics! Make way, please?"

But… she hadn't said anything about the medics.

Because she wasn't taking him there.

Oh. He knew this mix. Or, the closest thing to it because she clearly engineered the exact ratio to get something different from the typical getaway drug. Most operations only knocked people out and that didn't take more than a few ounces from the lab's store of…

He couldn't think of the name. But this was a mix of that and some paralytics.

They stumbled under a door marked 1-3 and the _towering_ figure of a man with red dreadlocks and a harsh, scarred face passed them by.

* * *

Was his ego more important to him than the universe?

Noel felt so light on his feet that a breeze could topple him.

"Is it?"

Serah and Snow walking hand-in-hand, Caius carrying Yeul away in a cloud of eternity, his grandmother falling to sickness and leaving him with the immortals. Yeul fading away and Caius disappearing.

Left at the end of the world with no one to say his name.

"… Noel? You still there?"

* * *

Footsteps. Close enough to see him.

Irvine slowly moved his head to a blonde kid coming his way. Should have heard that a long time ago – how did he not notice?

"Hey." The kid wore dark, baggy clothes and held his wild hair back with a pair of goggles on his forehead. "Let me see that."

* * *

"You can't be serious." It surprised him to get the words out. "You… Ellone."

She bounced her head from one side to the other. "Yes and no. But the explanation's coming later with refreshments, so just sit tight, okay?"

* * *

Something moved nearby. Noel felt it on the promenade.

But when he thought to take it, his stomach churned and he about toppled over. Something didn't connect, like when he couldn't move his mouth right after a dental appointment.

"Noel, I'm sorry you're so confused right now. How about we sleep it off? Cater can wait until this evening, can't she?"

"… Yeah." He put his head in his spare hand and massaged his temple. "I'll just… find time to sleep."

* * *

Irvine moved to put away his rifle and ask the kid about his intentions.

The kid took the rifle and aimed. Then fired.

Blood burst from Noel's neck.

Fired again and the chest broke. Phone hit the ground with a clatter.

Irvine finally moved.

The kid hit Noel in the abdomen and surrendered the rifle. Then walked off like nothing happened, leaving Irvine with the…

The…

Murder weapon.

He stood behind a decorative tree. Noel thudded to the ground and blood pooled about him. The phone was too far away to hear if Quistis remained on the other end.

Irvine looked down at the rifle and couldn't think past the question that repeated in his head over and over again… what to do?

* * *

A whirring in the distance. Seifer's vision flickered and his consciousness faded.

_Damn it, Kinneas._

He could only hope the cocky bastard knew how to run from a fight.


End file.
